Adopted

Here’s a small collection of links to stories about the adoption of today. They demonstrate the complexities, some of the variety of difficulties and the heartbreaking reality of what adoption is really about. The expression on the face of the 15 year old mother and her forced smile at the end when she has finished reading her script are tragic. Many older mothers would believe she has so much in store for her as the years roll by and she fully comes to understand what she has done to herself, as well as to her child. Perhaps she will forever remain in the fog, protected from pain and truth by the cloak of propaganda from those who convinced her, without much difficulty it seems, to go for adoption, or as it is known in adoptionland ‘making an adoption plan’. What is so scary is how commomplace adoption has become amongst girls like this one, how accepted, how ‘normal’ and how well the American adoption propoganda machine has done its work. It is chilling!
“When you’re 15 and pregnant you can’t do it without support” Unfortunatley that support is not to help a young mother keep her baby, learn to parent well and still achieve an education and her goals. My constant queries about modern adoption are “Doesn’t family matter any more? What happened to family ties? Can women be so easily talked out of their importance, their depth and integrity”

More promotion of a recent book and an interview with the author – http://killingthebuddha.com/mag/witness/truth-telling-in-vulgaria
While examples of abusive adoption practices have always been rationalized away as “bad apple” anomalies, even Christians who are leaders in the adoption field acknowledge that evangelicals can be the worst at promoting adoption with a “by any means necessary” attitude that excuses fraud or corruption as the cost of saving a child. If you think adoption is God’s mission, as many now do, it’s much easier to say—as some leaders told me they heard—that you’re “following God’s law, not man’s.”
The tragic story of a woman who did not grieve for her infertility until after adoption and the consequent results for the adoptee. Does anyone really recognise or care about the damage to adoptees and the children these scenarios present? I have seen that damage first hand, how much better ‘necessary adoption’ could be carried out and how much better assessment of prospctive adopters could be!- http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1085555/Why-waiting-years-baby-I-gave-adopted-son-back.html
‘I knew what the problem was – while I loved Ben, I couldn’t really love him in the way he deserved or needed from a mother.’
And another scenario becoming increasingly popular, the adoption of embryos for implantation –

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It seems journalists have not grasped how to adequately report these situations with accuracy or distinguish between an embryo and a baby! I know many of you have strong feelings about this new aspect of adoption and about the creation of embryos which are eventually allowed to die or are donated to others. Which is preferable or is it better not to create them at all?
I hope that those of you who are celebrating Mothers’ Day have a wonderful day and those of you who find it difficult, painful or depressing get through it as best you are able. Last year was the first year I managed to get through it without a meltdown of some sort and without ambivalence. I’m looking forward to a relaxed day of family contact. My beloved Daughter will be here for a sleepover the night before and a family dinner. The next morning will be spent having breakfast with my Godson and his family and then depending on the weather, an outing of some sort. I will at some point spend some time honouring the mother who gave birth to me and the mother who raised me and the mother who became my first mother-in-law. All of them influential in my life and without whom I would not be who I am today. I may even visit the place I was conceived, which is about 50kms away and was a popular holiday place for my ‘third mother’. I visit it regularly, but on this special day is is significant to be in the place where my parents met, loved and were parted by pregnancy, mine. They never it seems met again, although that is hazy and was rather glossed over by my mother. Happy Mothers’ Day!

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